He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
