You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
