i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
