My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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