good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
