Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
