It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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