his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
