I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
