no. you can't hotbox the world.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
