All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
the day after is always just damage control
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
