What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize