I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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