This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize
