What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
