i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
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Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
