The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
