no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
