i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
