happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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