I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
