seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
