Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She's the barista slut.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Randomize