if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Randomize
