After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
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