I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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