the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
i think i just lost a toe
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