I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
