Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
