Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Randomize
