stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
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