If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
