I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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