I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
