Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
