everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
