Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize
