She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize