what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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