chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
