HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
