Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
This toilet bowl is my home.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
