is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
