never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Randomize