it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
