Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize