i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
