from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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