Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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