I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
The best revenge is premature balding
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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