It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i think i have two assholes
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
